Ok, so I finally got my profile all set up and running and I have to say, I feel pretty happy with what I got down. I know I shouldn't be too surprised by this. I mean, it's all about me and what makes me happier then having a platform to talk about myself. But regardless of the fact that all the information is true, it makes me seem like a pretty cool person. That's what I like about filling out these profile forms. They take all the interesting things about you and make it into a quick concessive list. And lets be honest, aren't we constantly trying to do life that way? When we meet people for the first time we're always blowing smoke up their a** so that they don't realize how whinny, selfish or obnoxious we are. I noticed that there was no "what is your most annoying habit" section. Although, I think that would make it more interesting. And the "bragging rights"? What a winner! Everyone sounds cool when you put all their accomplishments in bullet point form. Seriously, I got so carried away, I started made stuff up! It just looks better with a longer list. Am I wrong?
But let me just say what peeves me off about setting up profiles and if your a sahm you probably feel my pain. Occupation. Now, it wouldn't bother me so much if not for the fact that there are usually five question pertaining to your occupation right under that and if your anything like me; seeing those blanks spots turns you into a crazy person! I normally just put homemaker (some times I like to put slave) but I know some jackhole behind the desk is smirking and thinking "I bet so". The problem is that we as a society have told ourselves that we aren't worth anything unless we have a fancy title attached to our names. And for some unexplainable reason "Mom" isn't prestigious enough. (side note: when I put sahm my autocorrect comes up as sham. Isn't it ironic?) And the worse offenders are women. (what a surprise) I can't tell you how many times I get,"it must be so nice to be able to do what ever you want during the day."
Are you serious?! Have you seen my children? Have you seen any children? Have you ever encountered a child anywhere your existence? I don't get to do what ever I want. I get to do what ever my kids want. Or more importantly, what ever my kids need. (Since I spend most of the day making them do things they don't like. Ex. eating, not playing in the street, making them wear underwear.) I can't even take a crap by myself without having to hold some one or read someone a book or say for the hundred and eleventh time "mommy is pooping she will get your doll from under the couch when she is done". Seriously, your three years old. Get your own effing doll.
And what is it about sitting still that makes children want you to do something. I swear, they are the worse boss anyone could ever have. "What? Your taking a lunch break? Not on my watch." Or have you ever had your boss watching you pee just to make sure your not taking any company time? I think not. Though we have those little buggers crawling into our laps asking for milk, or food (which they won't eat) or movie, or candy, or my knee hurts, or my bum hurts, or I want to go to the pool, or I want to go to the park, I don't want to take a nap, I want my doll, where's my blankey, where's my sussie, Agh!... So BACK OFF! I do work! I'm a mom.
I clean scraps and bruises. I chase monsters away. I play the prince. I catch the swan dive into the pool. I make paper snowflakes. I play tea party. I am a human trampoline. I'm the entertainer. I'm tummy trouble fixer. I'm the search and rescue for every toy under the sun. I can find shoes and keys. I can throw and catch. I can swim and fly. I am the teacher of songs, dances and dreams. I am the encourager, the comforter and the obstacle. I am the swing pusher, the rope turner and the leap frogger. I make people see their worth, their need and their purpose. So the next time you look down on me when I tell you what I do, remember that I'M the one who is going to change the world one child at a time!
Antenella
I'm so proud of you. This will be a success!
ReplyDelete