Growing up

Today marks a very big day for me.  Today is the first day that my princess is going to camp!  And not just for an hour or even two or three but all day!  9am-3pm!  That is by far the longest she has ever been away from me that didn't involve me leaving her with her nana to escaping with my husband on a date night.

I discovered something today.  As I was packing her little lunch box in her way-too-big-for-her backpack I started to get very sad.  I might have even shed a tear or two.  As much as I complain about how overwhelmed I am or how exhausting it is to have three kids under 4 or how nice it will be when they start school, I discovered that I am full of crap!

Pay no attention to the man
behind the curtain

Sure I get exhausted or overwhelmed, especially on the days where it's been weeks in a row of sleepless nights or the days were everyone is sick at once; but l wouldn't change anything for the world.  I feel so blessed to be given such an amazing task of raising my kids and trying to do right by them by teaching them right from wrong.  (Even if there is no vacation or bathroom breaks and the money sucks.)

I just feel like everything is happening too fast!  When did my baby grow up?  When did I start feeling confident that she would do great without me?  This is what we're trying to accomplish right?  The whole point is to get them to where they can become responsible and independent young adults?  Then why do I feel so sad?  Maybe because she's only 3 1/2? (what am I going to do when she goes to kindergarden or gasp* college? Sob*)

I feel like I've been going through the rest of the day in a blur.  I haven't really done anything different then when she is home but for some reason I feel so out of sorts.  Like something is missing.  Maybe it's because I actually got to eat lunch while sitting down or maybe it was the fact that I could write this post with out having to get up 15 times to get miscellaneous objects that she needed to fulfill her every whim but whatever it is, it's quiet.

One of the twins is napping so it's just me and the boy and I tell you that monster of a demon is a sweet baby angle when he's the only one around.  He is so grown up, he's so helpful, he listens, he doesn't whine or cry...

Hmmm...

Maybe there is something to this kids growing up and getting involved in there own activities.  It helps the next in line grow up.  He gets more attention, he gets to make his own decisions and the expectation of him contributing to the household is more eminent.  It is now time for him to be the big brother!

I just hope that I can manage watching Thomas the train engine for hours on end.

Antenella