So it dawned on me yesterday as I was driving all three of my kids to a therapy session for my youngest, that there is no other driver more distracted then a mom with three kids in the back seat of her car.
I understand that there is a huge push against texting and driving, for very good reasons. We have changed laws, had protests, lead by example and now it is illegal in many states if not all of them. Yay for democracy!
But what about the rest of us?
I remember driving BC (before children) and I would see moms leaning into the back seat as they are racing 70 mph down the freeway and I used to think (God, I was so cute) is it that important that they couldn't wait until you stopped or at least slowed down?
Flash forward 8 years and 3 kids later and this is what my morning commute looks like on a regular basis:
1. buckle everyone into their carseats while they wiggle, cry, whine and ask for everything under the sun.
2. Starting the engine means the immediate and dire importance of what we will be listening to because apparently the radio isn't good enough.
3. Pull out of drive way, while somebody cries that it is there turn to listen to their song.
4. If I haven't plugged in my iPod yet everyone starts asking what the heck is going on in their native language of "Scream"
5. Drink coffee. Now I am out of my neighborhood.
6. Someone is asking for water.
7. Two kids are now asking for water.
8. Two kids are now using their native tongue for water. *See #4*
9. I turn on the iPod to "Let it Go" Because it is the first freaking song on the play list.
10. Two kids are now crying that this isn't their song while one child sings at the top of her lungs. Ps: one of the crying children is still asking for water.
11. I get water for crying child.
12. I scream at other child (because it is their native language and seems to be the only thing they understand) and explain the nuances of something so backward as a "playlist"
We are only about half way to school by now.
13. I remember that I packed breakfast. Which consists of a protein bar.
14. Three kids in my back seat demand I share it with them.
15. In their native language I tell them that they already had breakfast and that this protein bar is most likely going to get me through till dinner.
16. Kids resign and switch to asking for water again.
17. I dig through my Mary Poppins bag where I can apparently pull out everything from a hair tie to my kindle without looking but the water bottles are lost forever in the abyss.
18. After narrowly hitting someone at the next red light. I finally look while digging through my bag to pull out three waters. I throw them into the back seat. Inevitably, someone does not catch theirs.
19. One uncoordinated child is now crying for their water that is rolling around the floor. I manage to catch it as it is rolling under my break pedal.
20. After another close call of almost ramming the person in front of me. I use the native language of my people and inform them that I will no longer be of any use to them other then driver for the rest of the trip.
21. Quite for 20 seconds.
22. My youngest takes this opportunity to point out every little thing out the window and then yells at me when I don't look. Most of what she is looking at has passed us ten minutes ago.
23. My son is now crying because his song is over and now its another girl song.
24. Coffee is still being consumed along with the last of the protein bar. (I can see the school from here)
25. One final turn but now I am getting into a lane with 25 other distracted moms and it's basically a free for all as we pull into the parking lot.
26. Park. Turn off car and have everyone cry because the song wasn't over.
...
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| it's kinda like this but now picture that entire back seat lined with crying children. |
Where's my bumper sticker?
Antenella
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